The name of my blog is a reminder not to give all my energy to something that worry cannot control—something that can happen to anyone, at any time, for no clear reason.
Why me?
Why not?
Last fall, I changed oncologists. I mentioned an area of concern that one of my surgeons had noticed on a scan two years earlier. My previous oncologist decided to “watch and wait,” but that never sat well with Bobby or me.
My new oncologist moved quickly and immediately began investigating. She ordered scans and referred me to a thoracic surgical oncologist, who ordered more detailed imaging followed by two surgical biopsies.
First, we needed to rule out recurrent breast cancer. Another major concern was pancreatic cancer because the scans revealed a cluster of enlarged lymph nodes and a mesenteric mass surrounding the celiac artery.
That brought us to March and, once again, we waited—through appointments, blood tests and consultations.
My diagnosis: follicular lymphoma, a type of non-Hodgkin lymphoma.
Blood cancer.
Speed bump.
For two weeks, we sat with the possibility of a surgically implanted port and R-CHOP chemotherapy.
The thought of putting my life on hold so that I could continue living made me angry. I was in disbelief.
My body and mind had already endured so much during the previous two and a half years: breast cancer, a pandemic, six surgeries, my brother’s death and even my big boy leaving for college two states away.
Despite everything, I honestly had never felt stronger—physically or mentally.
Gradually, my anger and disbelief began to soften.
I started preparing for a pause in my life so that I could protect my future. I prioritized the things I wanted to continue and considered what I might need to put on hold.
I knew I wanted to continue practicing and teaching yoga, so I decided not to plant a garden that year. A summer family vacation seemed unlikely, so we planned a last-minute trip to Nashville for the week before treatment.
I researched nutrition and ways to manage the possible effects of chemotherapy.
I cut off my hair.
Less than a week ago, I added another oncologist to my anticancer army. Her specialty is hematology.
She explained follicular lymphoma by comparing it to a weed in a garden: We treat it, watch it and, if it grows again, treat it again. It is generally considered incurable, but it is treatable.
She leads the department and is also involved in research—a rock star in hematology-oncology.
She gave me several treatment options. The first choice was targeted therapy using rituximab, a monoclonal antibody given through weekly infusions.
It seemed like a good place to begin.
I’m all in.
And just like that, we start Friday.
For the next four Fridays, I’ll be at the cancer center for treatments that could last between five and eight hours. After the fourth week, I’ll take a break and have scans to measure my response.
We are hoping to see the mass shrink significantly. If it doesn’t, my doctor has more options in her cancer-fighting arsenal.
For now, we are beginning with a treatment plan that is expected to be less difficult on my entire body than traditional chemotherapy.
I can garden. We may still be able to take a vacation. I’m embracing my short hair and, of course, continuing with yoga.
I can still do the things that matter to me. I may need to slow down, but all my energy is focused on this treatment working.
Why me?
Why not?
If you would like to join me, please send a little love, energy, encouragement and a few good thoughts my way.
Why me? Why Not? 
Lisa!Prayers and love sent your way!I am sorry you have to deal with this again!But you are strong❤️🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
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Thank you! Strong with support from family and friends like you!!
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Lisa!!! You are one of the strongest women I know. I am so very sorry that you have to go down this road, but you’ve GOT THIS!! Love you & will be praying for you. ❤️❤️
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Thank you my friend!!!
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Lisa, your positivity and strength are powerful and encouragement to all of us. Sending positive vibes to my college friend. 💕💕💕
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Thanks you so much!
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Beautiful friend, you have been through so much. You are so tough and that strength is inspiring AF. I am going to send you massive positive vibes every Friday from all the way across the country.
Big hugs to you, my first pregnancy partner in crime. ❤️
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I know I’ll be feeling your support! Thank you Dana!!
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Many, many prayers & positive & healing vibes being sent to you my friend & I will forever say FUCK CANCER!!😈
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Thanks Friend! My mantra: Fuck Cancer!!
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To my sister warrior and one of the strongest women I know: girl, you got this. Carry out the plan, see it through and kick cancer’s ass to the curb. Sending positive vibes your way!!!❤️
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Takes one to know one! But really thanks for your vibes, your messages and insight over the past two years.
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Lisa,
You are right, this is just a “speed bump.” You slow down and adjust. I love that you refer to it as that. Your Positive thinking and your strength will get you through this. This does not define you at all! Prayers and positive vibes going your way big time!
Love,
Jen
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Thanks Jen!
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Wow! I always knew you were strong but holy moly are you one BADASS woman!! Keep kicking cancer’s ass and living life to the fullest! Praying for you you and with you! Sending big love and hugs from Washington!! 💞🥰🙏
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Thanks Jen, I’ll take all the love and hugs.
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Girl..you are amazing! I am with you every step of the journey! You are my inspiration!
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Awe I miss you and those lazy stay-at-home days!
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Lisa I truly am left speechless. The beauty and gracefulness of your words filled with hope while trudging through this darkness are inspiring. I miss you and your sweet face. You are a warrior!! I will be praying big prayers for you my friend.
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Awe thanks Courtney! Miss our long walks and longer talks!!
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Lisa, you are one of the strongest people I’ve ever had the opportunity to know. I’m lifting you up in prayer, and sending positive vibes your way. You’ve got this!!!
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Thank you Andie!
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Lisa, my heart is broken, I’m speechless with concern!
You are such a strong person, I wish to have half of your mental strength.
Stay strong, keep kicking A$$ and never let anyone steal your fire!
Miss you BIG.
Tina Dina
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Miss you so so much! “Pain is temporary, Finish is forever” learned that from you!
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I am so very sorry sweet friend. I had no idea that you were going through all this. I will keep you in my prayers.❤️
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I will see you on the mat very soon!!
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I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers – I admire your strength – I love your short hair and your smile just makes you even brighter.
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Thanks Tara!
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Sending good thoughts to you and your family!
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